Feedback that lands

Run 1:1s that lower fear and raise clarity.

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Why this works

Clear structure and plain words reduce fear in 1:1s. People hear your message and act on it.

Try these drills

Name it to tame it (30 seconds)

30 seconds
  1. Notice the emotion in one word.
  2. Say quietly: 'I feel …'.
  3. Let the label lower the intensity by about 10 percent.

Outcome: Lower reactivity; more choice.

Mechanism: Putting a word to a feeling quiets the brain's alarm system, so the feeling feels smaller and you can choose better.

Summarize before you argue

1 minute
  1. State the other view in one clear line.
  2. Ask: 'Did I get that right?'
  3. Share your view and suggest the next step.

Outcome: Lowers heat and builds shared understanding.

Mechanism: When people feel understood, defensiveness drops. Then logic lands and you can reach agreement faster.

Scripts

Clean apology

  • you: I missed the expectation and that affected your timeline. I will do X by end of day and add Y check. Anything else you need?

Why this works: Owning impact plus a concrete fix restores trust faster than excuses or vague promises.

What to measure

  • fewer escalations
  • time to agreement
  • post meeting sentiment

FAQ

Will these scripts sound robotic?

They are templates. Use your own words. Simple beats clever.

What if the other person gets upset?

Return to a short summary, name the impact, and suggest the next step.

Ready to get started?

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