Own it, but don’t over‑own it
A simple three‑part apology: impact, fix, and check.
Test your conflict EQWhy this works
Clear impact plus a fix and a quick check ends the issue faster than long explanations.
Try these drills
Name it to tame it (30 seconds)
30 seconds- Notice the emotion in one word.
- Say quietly: 'I feel …'.
- Let the label lower the intensity by about 10 percent.
Outcome: Lower reactivity; more choice.
Mechanism: Putting a word to a feeling quiets the brain's alarm system, so the feeling feels smaller and you can choose better.
Scripts
Clean apology
- you: I missed the expectation and that affected your timeline. I will do X by end of day and add Y check. Anything else you need?
Why this works: Owning impact plus a concrete fix restores trust faster than excuses or vague promises.
What to measure
- fewer escalations
- time to agreement
- post meeting sentiment
FAQ
Will these scripts sound robotic?▼
They are templates. Use your own words. Simple beats clever.
What if the other person gets upset?▼
Return to a short summary, name the impact, and suggest the next step.